Author: Maria Johnson

Newspeak

If you haven’t read 1984, now is a good time to read it. On second thought, before November 4, 2008 would have been better timing. As they say, timing is everything, and we missed that boat, if you’ll pardon the mixed metaphor.

It seems that our Secretary of Homeland Security is on the one hand terrified of using the word terrorist when speaking about TERRORISTS…

Instead of referring to threats from terrorists, Janet Napolitano is referring in her speeches to “man-caused disasters.” In an interview, a reporter for Germany’s Spiegel Online asked Napolitano whether her avoidance of the term terrorism means that “Islamist terrorism suddenly no longer pose[es] a threat to your country?”

“Of course it does,” Napolitano replied. “I presume there is always a threat from terrorism. In my speech, although I did not use the word ‘terrorism,’ I referred to ‘man-caused’ disasters. That is perhaps only a nuance, but it demonstrates that we want to move away from the politics of fear toward a policy of being prepared for all risks that can occur.”

By this logic, the FBI should refer to serial killers and serial rapists as “man-caused afflictions.” After all, we do not want to create fear about serial killers.

…and on the other hand not at all shy about referring to conservatives as TERRORISTS-waiting-to-happen. I suppose my husband is suspect, since he’s been terrifying our children’s friends for years. It’s not the six foot three frame, the gruff demeanor, nor the booming bass that offends. Nope. It’s the service ribbon he wore so proudly on his Army uniform. That’s right. He’s a veteran. That qualifies him as a potential threat to the very country he served.

Astoundingly, as a Pro-Life Catholic, I seem to be a TERRORIST, too. 

Rightwing extremism in the United States can be broadly divided into those groups, movements, and adherents that are primarily hate-oriented (based on hatred of particular religious, racial or ethnic groups), and those that are mainly antigovernment, rejecting federal authority in favor of state or local authority, or rejecting government authority entirely. It may include groups and individuals that are dedicated to a single issue, such as opposition to abortion or immigration.

I think it’s time to watch my copy of It’s a Mad Mad Mad Mad World.

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link 1   link 2   link 3

ah, the end of the term: bring on the whiners, whingers, and victims…

Courtesy of the rounds on Facebook:

ripToday we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense , who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
– Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
– Why the early bird gets the worm;
– Life isn’t always fair;
– and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing
regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
I Know My Rights
I Want It Now
Someone Else Is To Blame
I’m A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

to my absolute joy!

I found further evidence with which to annoy my children. It’s my hobby.

I have been excluded, ignored, chided, ridiculed, and finally befriended by them on Facebook. And the ridiculing continues.

It’s a beautiful thing. I post something. One of them tells me why I am a creeper, or a stalker or uncool.

My status is analyzed and deconstructed.

To my absolute joy, though, I discovered this article in last month’s Time Magazine that must have escaped their attention. Here it is. Enjoy it.

I hope you get some satisfaction, too. 😉

what a crazy snow storm!

First, relax. I mean, snow storm for most of you is a serious thing. I’m talking about a snow storm in Atlanta, which pretty much means a couple of inches of snow that had the audacity to stick for more than an hour. Even as I write, it’s starting to melt and turn into something more dangerous: ice.

Ice is something we are familiar with around here, and it ain’t pretty.

But I digress. I just wanted to share with you today’s adventures. It started snowing at around 11 in the morning. It was the typical ATL snow–a little rain, a little sleet, some random flurries. And then, BAM! It started snowing in earnest. We had some pretty big and fluffy flakes.

John and Christy got back from Miami in the nick of time. By 3 o’clock, there was some very real snow falling. You can see the beginning of it here:

We had to be on the road by 3:30 to deliver Vicky to the hotel by the airport where she had to check in for some Army processing, and we were going to hang around with her for dinner and stuff until her curfew, but she said she wanted us to go back home because the road conditions were so poor. I left reluctantly, but after a few minutes on the road was thankful that we had made the decision to leave. I slid around on some curves, and then it got ugly with very poor visibility. Remember that later.

Jonathan called to say that his youth group was cancelled, so we headed to the church to pick him up. We stayed for the Mass, which was poorly attended, and got caught in a blizzard! No kidding! It was snowing like what we had experienced in Germany. Visibility was very poor, and conditions were pretty dangerous. Yes. Dangerous. A tree fell in front of us on Bluebird Hill and even though I hit the brakes as gently as possible, we slid right into it.  The tree sailed over the top of the car (by the way, in the same spot where I hit that big deer a few years ago). All I can say is that I may drive a loser cruiser, but it has it’s advantages with the cowcatcher design in the front. 😉

Anyway, all is well. School is cancelled for tomorrow. I’m not sure if my college will decide to close, but I am predicting that I will cancel my class. We live at the top of a hill. The ice is forming even as I write.

Paul Harvey died :(

I loved his segments about the news, and especially the features about people in the news. On the numerous road trips back and forth from Miami and the myriad other road adventures, he was always on some random AM station to keep me company. I really grew to appreciate both his content and delivery.

It’s just not going to be the same…

You can read “the rest of the story” here.

now that the cat is out of the bag

I guess now that the family knows, it’s safe to announce to the rest of the world that my child has lost her mind and enlisted in the United States Army, where her illustrious Commander-in-Chief is President Obama. I love irony in my life. She will quickly gain a new perspective on irony, too.

Anyway, it’s too easy to make fun of a path that she has clearly been on for a while. Good luck to her on that endeavor–she’ll be great.  At the very least, she’ll look fetching in camo.

I’ll probably post something all full of pride and stuff after she survives boot camp and finishes all the cool things she will be studying in this next phase, and one hopes there will be a commission sooner rather than later, but that’s not what this post is about.

This post is about making fun of her because, well, she deserves it. Enjoy the film clip, it’s very appropriate. You might want to check her blog for a different perspective on this adventure, too.