Author: Maria Johnson

Paul Newman died…

That makes me sad.

I always felt like the odd woman out when everyone was gushing over Robert Redford and I liked Paul Newman.

Here they are back in the day. You decide, but I’m sticking by Newman.

Robert Redford and Paul Newman.
Robert Redford and Paul Newman.

where in the world are you, John Ringo?

So this morning I was listening to the Daily Breakfast as I worked, and something that Fr. Roderick said in the episode’s post-production had me thinking about a period in my life when I was heavily into (um, perhaps that period has not ended) science-fiction, and I was thinking about some nerdy friends that I had way back then.

They were BOYS. Oh my. Because really, none of the girls I knew liked science-fiction, they were too busy liking BOYS. Riiiiight.

I often tell young ladies to marry a nerd—they make good husbands and make good livings.

As I was saying, I was reminiscing joyfully about some of those guys, and I remembered two—John Webber, who sat at my table during math class, and we spent more time drawing and creating ‘zine-like scenarios for Space:1999 than perhaps paying attention to the algebra concepts, and another guy, John Ringo, who was in my grade but not in my class. I kinda liked John Ringo. He had a lot of redeeming qualities. He had a great vocabulary and he was taller than me. That was very important in the 8th grade.

We ended up going on a date or two, and then, who knows—adolescence. I remember Pizza Hut, and some godawful school dance where no one danced. I suspect we could have waltzed. He probably knew how. Ha!

Anyway, that was the night that my brother stood on his bed with binoculars and watched John and his sister and brother-in-law (our ride and chaperones) drive up to get me. I think we went to a movie on another occasion. Ha, again!

That is all. I thought I’d share. I mean, it was clearly destiny that I should marry a guy named John. He was a nerd. And he’s a good husband. And he has a good job.

***

There’s a science-fiction writer named John Ringo, but I’m not going to do the creepy facebook stalking thing. I mean, for what? I can’t say I’m all that interested in resuscitating anything from my school days (they were good enough—just not into the whole re-living the past thing), but here’s hoping he turned out well.

How I love to ruffle feathers!

So I posted the body of an email forward below. Understand that I have no regard for email forwards and spend endless hours debunking the ridiculous claims found in them. This one was an entertaining pipe dream, similar to when the lottery gets up $285 million and I sit around figuring out how I am going to distribute the millions to my family and friends (hmmmm, are YOU on my list?).

Anyway, I love comment love (what blogger doesn’t) but it seems that a few people either a) took this seriously, or worse, b) think that I took it seriously. Take a moment to check out that I posted it under the category “fun” as in, I think this would be fun, but I know it’s not real.

Now please, get a sense of humor.

my dad sent this to me; yes he of the multitude of forwards

I had to share. I mean, really, food for thought:

I’m against the $85,000,000,000.00 bailout of AIG.
 
Instead, I’m in favor of giving $85,000,000,000 to America in
a We Deserve It Dividend.
 
To make the math simple, let’s assume there are 200,000,000 bonafide U.S. Citizens 18+.  Our population is about 301,000,000 +/- counting every man, woman and child. So 200,000,000 might be a fair stab at adults 18 and up..
 
So divide 200 million adults 18+  into $85 billon that equals $425,000.00.
 
My plan is to give $425,000 to every person 18+ as a We Deserve It Dividend.
 
Of course, it would NOT be tax free.  So let’s assume a tax rate of 30%.  Every individual 18+ has to pay $127,500.00 in taxes. That sends $25,500,000,000 right back to Uncle Sam.
 
But it means that every adult 18+ has $297,500.00 in their pocket.  A husband and wife has $595,000.00.
 
What would you do with $297,500.00 to $595,000.00 in your family?

  • Pay off your mortgage – housing crisis solved.
  • Repay college loans – what a great boost to new grads
  • Put away money for college – it’ll be there
  • Save in a bank – create money to loan to entrepreneurs.
  • Buy a new car – create jobs
  • Invest in the market – capital drives growth
  • Pay for your parent’s medical insurance – health care improves
  • Enable Deadbeat Dads to come clean – or else 
     

Remember this is for every adult U S Citizen 18+  including the folks who lost their jobs at Lehman Brothers and every other company that is cutting back. And of course, for those serving in our Armed
Forces.
 
If we’re going to re-distribute wealth let’s really do it…instead oftrickling out a puny $1000.00 ( “vote buy” ) economic incentive that is being proposed by one of our candidates for President.
 
If we’re going to do an $85 billion bailout, let’s bail out every adult U S Citizen 18+!
 
As for AIG – liquidate it.

Sell off its parts.

Let American General go back to being American General.
Sell off the real estate.

Let the private sector bargain hunters cut it up and clean it up.
 
Here’s my rationale. We deserve it and AIG doesn’t.
 
Sure it’s a crazy idea that can “never work.” But can you imagine the Coast-To-Coast Block Party!
 
How do you spell Economic Boom?
 
I trust my fellow adult Americans to know how to use the $85 Billion We Deserve It Dividend more than I do the geniuses at AIG or in Washington DC.
 
And remember, The Birk plan only really costs $59.5 Billion because $25.5 Billion is returned instantly in taxes to Uncle Sam.
 
Ahhh…I feel so much better getting that off my chest.

Birk
T. J. Birkenmeier, A Creative Guy & Citizen of the Republic

It’s National Puntuation Day

Did you notice that I used the apostrophe correctly? We don’t need to discuss my use of the adverb until National Grammar Day on March 4th.

Anyway, I’m tickled by this picture encouraging readers to get the “offical meat loaf” of National Punctuation Day. There’s a recipe. I think I’ll pass.

get the recipe!
get the recipe!

not a fan of being the harbinger of doom

The good people in Atlanta are a bit hysterical over the gas thing. I mean, we’ve already been paying over $4 a gallon — the fact that it dropped 35 cents and then went back up is, like, no big deal (please understand that I am outraged by gas prices, but not surprised that gas could go down to as little as $50 a barrel and we’d still be paying through the nose at the pump).

Anyway, Hurricane Ike has now caused a meltdown in the metro-Atlanta area comparable  to the depletion of bread and milk when there’s a threat of a quarter of an inch of snow.

There is no gas to be found anywhere, sparking arguments at pumps where people are trying to fill their tanks, and folks in line curse them out for “using up all the gas.” Get real people! We live in a consumer society and last time I checked things still worked on a first-come first-served mentality. I mean really–who told these goobers to drive around until they are on fumes and then hope there’s a station that still has gas in their vicinity.

And please don’t turn your poor planning into my problem.

Who’s the hottest guy in the Coast Guard?

Yeah, I thought so. We know who are hero is, the one in the dorky helmet! Check this out, and then read the press release.

Thanks to all the brave men and women who serve our country. It’s not a flawless country. It’s not even even a country that is free from the ills that plague other countries on earth, but it’s ours, and it’s worth protecting. In this case, these fine coast guards protected more than the coast–they stopped the delivery of an obscene amount of cocaine destined to ruin more people and communities.

Good work guys!

new Monday Musings (don’t faint)

It seems like I’ve been in a bit of a prayer rut lately. Maybe it’s the changing season; maybe it’s that I am undergoing some kind of change myself. I dunno. But I do know that I have felt an absence of something, or perhaps not so much an absence of something as a deep-seated yearning for something more.

Enter the social utilities where I play a bit throughout the day. Many of you come to the forums here at Rosary Army. Others participate in any number of opportunities to twitter, plurk, pownce, rejaw and otherwise microblog your activities throughout the day. These utilities are wonderful ways for us to connect to a community of faithful Catholics that share our lives in all the mundane and dramatic turns that make us human.

One of my plurky friends, Edgar the Mexican, announces the Angelus daily. Okay, it’s not a ringing bell, but it is a call to prayer nonetheless. Do churches outside of Rome even ring the bells anymore?

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