fun

I had a terrible day today

You’ve had that kind of day, too. Everything that had been festering around for a while decided it was all going to blow at the same time, and then, it’s all my fault. Like I was engaged in some cosmic plan to ruin humanity or something. Because I have that kind of power, don’t you know.

The thing is, I think I gave as good as I got, in a polite, uptight kind of way. Which is why I am sharing this email with you. My father, he-of-the-insufferable-number-of email-forwards fame sent me this a few days ago, and as usual, I ignored it until I had some time to decide if it was going straight into the trash, or what. As it happens, it’s a gem that’s perfect for the day.

 

Quote of the day:
“Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she’ll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.
So, if you give her any crap, be ready …”

sometime you just have to say what’s on your mind when discussing hacks…

Re: Declaration of Reasonable Doubt About the Identity of William Shakespeare

Dear Jeffrey Jeffrey Jeffrey,

I am writing to invite you to please join Sir Derek Jacobi, Jeremy Irons, Mark Rylance, Michael York, myself, and more than 1,400 others, including over 250 faculty members, in signing the Declaration of Reasonable Doubt About the Identity of William Shakespeare. It can be signed online at the website of the Shakespeare Authorship Coalition (SAC) at: www.DoubtAboutWill.org

Orthodox Shakespeare scholars claim that there is “no room for doubt” about the author’s identity. They say that the authorship controversy is therefore not legitimate, and should not be seen as an appropriate topic for research, or classroom discussion. It is often regarded as a taboo subject, which professors and students pursue at their peril. We believe that an objective assessment of the evidence shows that there are good reasons to doubt the traditional attribution, and the issue should therefore be regarded as legitimate.

The Declaration was written to clarify why so many outstanding thinkers have expressed doubt about the author’s identity. It also provides a convenient way for prominent people to take a moderate, reasonable position on the issue, while putting their doubts on record. It provides a brief, yet definitive statement of the evidence and arguments for and against William Shakspere of Stratford, but it takes no position on the true identity of the author. Thus, doubters of any persuasion can sign it, and even some traditionalists have done so. It has been fully vetted, with not one factual error identified, even by orthodox scholars.

your friend,

Bego

what a crazy snow storm!

First, relax. I mean, snow storm for most of you is a serious thing. I’m talking about a snow storm in Atlanta, which pretty much means a couple of inches of snow that had the audacity to stick for more than an hour. Even as I write, it’s starting to melt and turn into something more dangerous: ice.

Ice is something we are familiar with around here, and it ain’t pretty.

But I digress. I just wanted to share with you today’s adventures. It started snowing at around 11 in the morning. It was the typical ATL snow–a little rain, a little sleet, some random flurries. And then, BAM! It started snowing in earnest. We had some pretty big and fluffy flakes.

John and Christy got back from Miami in the nick of time. By 3 o’clock, there was some very real snow falling. You can see the beginning of it here:

We had to be on the road by 3:30 to deliver Vicky to the hotel by the airport where she had to check in for some Army processing, and we were going to hang around with her for dinner and stuff until her curfew, but she said she wanted us to go back home because the road conditions were so poor. I left reluctantly, but after a few minutes on the road was thankful that we had made the decision to leave. I slid around on some curves, and then it got ugly with very poor visibility. Remember that later.

Jonathan called to say that his youth group was cancelled, so we headed to the church to pick him up. We stayed for the Mass, which was poorly attended, and got caught in a blizzard! No kidding! It was snowing like what we had experienced in Germany. Visibility was very poor, and conditions were pretty dangerous. Yes. Dangerous. A tree fell in front of us on Bluebird Hill and even though I hit the brakes as gently as possible, we slid right into it.  The tree sailed over the top of the car (by the way, in the same spot where I hit that big deer a few years ago). All I can say is that I may drive a loser cruiser, but it has it’s advantages with the cowcatcher design in the front. 😉

Anyway, all is well. School is cancelled for tomorrow. I’m not sure if my college will decide to close, but I am predicting that I will cancel my class. We live at the top of a hill. The ice is forming even as I write.

that 25 things meme

It’s been annoying me to get tagged because I usually ignore these things unless they really capture my interest, but I guess it’s grown on me. So here goes, in no particular order:

1. I don’t like to use public bathrooms.

2. I used to dye my hair, and now that I have more gray than ever, just forgot to keep up with it.

3. I like the tv show, House

4. I go to work every day and pretend to know what I am doing. I profess with great alacrity and confidence. Maybe I’ll be able to keep up the ruse until retirement.

5. My favorite candy bar is Zero.

6. I have a minor in French.

7. I majored in psychology right up until I had to take clinicals and couldn’t pick up the rats. I don’t regret the switch to literature, although history would have been a close second. That means I also have a minor in psychology, for what it’s worth.

8. I like to eat fried eggs and rice with ketchup all over it.

9. I’ve always loved my kids, but now that they are big and know how to bathe themselves, I find them interesting and fun to be with because they are interesting people, not just because I spawned them.

10. I once spent the night in a whorehouse. With a gay man. I slept with one eye open, and he slept in a chair leaning against the door. (I can’t wait to hear from my parents on this one).

11. My nieces and nephews have the most beautiful laughs. Ever.

12. I love yellow roses. It’s a bad habit I acquired from my honey. 😉

13. I can’t read music. A number of music-people have tried to teach me, and the only thing worse than my frustration, is their defeat. Ha!

14. I was a cheerleader. (believe me, I don’t believe it either).

15. I broke a priest’s fingers in a pick up basketball game. Nobody was safe when I played b-ball.

16. I like Christy’s musical selections.

17. I fell in love with my husband because he has manly hands.

18. My pinkies and the second toe on both feet are really crooked. (I saw this on somebody else’s list–how weird is that?).

19. I once dreamed of competing in the Olympics, but then my heart conked out and couldn’t pursue a college career.

20. I like old-school Cuban music, crooners, blues, and country music.

21. I don’t like dolls.

22. I used to paint when I was a kid. I’m thinking of trying my hand at it again.

23. I’d like to travel in space.

24. I don’t really like burned toast or anything else that is over done, although I sometimes pull the mommy switch.

25. I want to go to Las Vegas!

the show’s over, the fat lady sang, and a good time was had by all!

The Haiti Humanitarian Fund dinner and show went well and everybody had a good time. Here are some of the sillies in costume.

"Mo" Doe, James Bond, and Devon Ayer
“Mo” Doe, James Bond, and Devon Ayer

And of course the poor maligned waitress that kept getting run over…

titi

Check out Mo’s real antique spurs…

spurs

it’s a little cold around here today

nice cup, huh? feeling like CPT Picard a little...
nice cup, huh? feeling like CPT Picard a little...

The forecast seems a little bleak for the weekend and early next week. A little break with some tea to warm the old bones is in order. Evidently it is time to go to the grocery store and buy milk and bread. I still don’t understand why Atlantans buy bread and milk when there’s the threat of winter weather, but hey, when in Rome….

Perhaps you’ve noticed that my posts have been limited, and pretty lame. I don’t know why that happens when I am doing other writing and stuff, but it seems to be in cycles. Whatever. Get over it–I sure have. I am thinking about returning to posting sarcastic and mean stuff at the other blog, and saving this one for my rational self.

Anyway, thought I’d share about this incredibly demanding distraction. Last year while working on That Catholic Show, I collaborated on an episode with one of the catechists at church. She wanted an episode about confirmation and I told her she’d have to help me with it if she was going to be making requests. It turned out to be a neat episode that wasn’t produced, but led to some other collaborations because it turns out we worked pretty well together.

[Let me interrupt a moment and point out that if you’re not listening to The Catholics Next Door on Sirius/XM, then you are losers–Greg and Jennifer are hysterical. And serious. And wonderfully entertaining. And expecting a baby any minute now!]

As I was saying, it led to some other things, and we recently wrote a dinner theater play for the Haiti Humanitarian Fund. It was hard at first because I didn’t have Greg telling me that the play sucked and go back and do it again, but I would read it out loud to the wall and pretend he was making distasteful faces, and found my rhythm. Thanks Greg–even imaginary Greg is a demanding guy. Ha!

Tonight is the dress rehearsal and sound check, and tomorrow night is the dinner. I hope it is well-received but have the security of knowing that even if it flops, the audience will be nice and donate to the medical mission. Still, insecurity abounds. Let me just say that I prefer to write over directing. More on this later this weekend when I post some pictures.