The Great Twitter Wars

This has nothing to do with

It has everything to do with discerning birds, two very different bird feeders, and a very self-satisfied husband who is, well, not at all self-satisfied at the moment.

The story begins at the beginning, when the grand scheme to landscape the backyard began.

It was a good idea at the time…hubby wanted to make a pretty oasis for us. I am grateful for every part of it — even when I thought I’d hate the roof instead of a pergola…and adding a retaining wall … and extending the driveway.

In short, I bitched and moaned my way into loving all the little things he did. Silly me.

And still, he asks me what I’d like. When I picked a red birdhouse that is big and fairly nondescript except the color, he asked me if I wouldn’t rather have this green one that looks a little sturdier.

I said “no” so he dutifully bought and installed the red one, all the while asking me if I didn’t really prefer the green one.

You know the green one showed up in the yard, right? LOL. It was a matter of time.

Enter the birds.

They prefer the red feeder. In fact, they have practically rejected the green one. I’d laugh if it wasn’t hurting my poor honey’s feelings — oh to be rejected by these greedy birds. They’ve gone through 20 pounds of bird feed in less than 2 weeks.

Today was just too much. We were sitting in the cool morning shadows, drinking coffee and chatting when he became distracted by the birds that were insisting on getting every last bit of feed out of the feeder while barely checking out the other one, close by and full.

He observed that the red feeder, easily accessible and overflowing with feed that comes out so quickly it not only feeds a variety (and a ton!) of birds, but even the squirrels and chipmunks are feasting on the excess.

And then he pointed out that my feeder is the welfare state — greedy birds abusing the food and using it and wasting it, and then angry with each other when it’s all gone, while his feeder is serving the dignified birds in an orderly way, with an abundance of food available to the birds who don’t mind the extra wait and effort to land on the arm that opens the feed.


I’d laugh, except the analogy is too good.