I’m partial to Truman Capote. Though, Proust. Proust! That might be more effective.
I got out of my car and freaked out a little bit because I had the feeling that my neighbor’s gigantic pine trees were cracking and falling down. Let me tell you how creepy that was — the trees are very tall, and falling branches around here kill people.
I looked up, trying to scan the tree tops for the offending branch getting ready to annihilate me, when I caught sight of the culprit.
This is the biggest, baddest woodpecker I have ever seen. And he was going to town on the branch. Going to town.
I admire his tenacity. Peck peck peck. Going to town.
I’m inspired to get back to my keyboard and do the same. Peck peck peck.
1. that first delicious stretch in the morning
smell taste of just-brewed coffee
3. the rhythmic swish and scratch of the pen on the page in an eruption of inspiration
Some days I have it in spades.
Let me just say that as a writer, I live in the land of insecurity.
Do my readers get me? Did I communicate what I meant? Does anyone even read what I write?
Sometimes I feel like I’m driving in heavy traffic, talking to myself, and suddenly, the teen-aged version of me asks, “Are you talking to yourself?”
It’s that moment when I’m embarrassed and can still laugh at myself all at the same time. I think that part is important — the ability to laugh. Especially at myself.
I know deep down my insecurity is just a feeling that goes hand in hand with the creative process. I create something. I put it out there. You judge it. It’s all very scary.
And it’s all about me. Insecurity is internal: it’s always about me, me, me! What if I take that insecurity and turn it inside out?
What if instead of me, I think of you? What if instead of being insecure and being self-absorbed in my perceived short-comings, I move that energy outward and inspire?
I like that a whole lot better. It takes the attention away from me and places it on you — to encourage you — to inspire you.
Because if I can take a risk and write, you can take a risk to do whatever it is you were meant to do.
I suppose, as I remove spiderweb from my face and hair, that I could see this as, perhaps, a message that I could be as committed to success in my own projects. I get it. I do. I’ll go build some spiderwebs of my own.
Then, I will sit quietly with my coffee and watch the rest of the world do the “freaked out oh my god I just walked into a spiderweb dance.” And laugh.
I submit the following for your enjoyment:
I make it a serious point to avoid talking about my students although I could have a field day sharing some of the zinger stories packed away in a not-so-little “Do not disturb” file in a dusty corner of my brain. Anyway, I’m breaking my own rule to talk about an experience I had this week.
I have a few “older” students in an introductory class. By “older” I mean people who could be my parents, or older. I love them. Besides having excellent writing skills, they bring so much to the class discussions. These are folks who have sacrificed much in their lives, and are now returning to school in the ultimate delayed gratification scenario. Once, I had such a student share that she didn’t care if she never went to work in her field because she just wanted the satisfaction of having the degree.
Anyway, one of my current students, an African American lady, shared that the last time she was in school her high school was segregated, and she found this new experience of sitting in a college classroom different and exciting. Wow! She lamented her impression of the youth around her wasting the opportunity to get an education, so she decided to pave the way. I hope she is successful, not in the classroom — it’s obvious to me that she will, but in the environment where she is trying to foster a desire for an education. She’s certainly a fantastic example to the students in her class.
Anyway, I just wanted to share that. I figure, there’s too much bad news on TV — I better report on something cool. That, and I have to figure out how to get her to share her story openly in the class.
That is all. Have a nice day. 🙂