I just drank poison

It’s called Cherry Coke Zero.

Look, I used to smoke cigarettes and drink Tab; it’s not like I have an aversion to chemicals. But, really. This is the sickest thing I’ve had in a while. Grosser, even, than Vanilla Coke, and that tasted like sucking on a vanilla candle.

Why can’t Coca-Cola leave well-enough alone? And why does the high school think it’s a good move to remove all the high-calorie Coke products because of health reasons, but leave the foul and poisonous cancer-causing saccharine products?

Riddle me this Batman: What’s in a sexy little bottle disguised with the Coke logo and a silly cartoon cherry? Cherry Dimetapp.

Who thought medicine was a good taste for a soft drink?

Not me.

Coke, you have disappointed me for the last time. I’m drinking water from now on. From the water fountain.