I never imagined that teasing John about his new gardening hobby could be so sweet and satisfying…as in sweet, tasty fruit.
Prior to this, it was mostly making fun of his FarmVille habit, but these days, I’m shutting up. It turns out I am enjoying working alongside him in the evenings. We don’t do much…a little watering, a little weeding, maybe some pruning. Then we sit down and wait for the lightning bugs to come out.
Mostly, we just enjoy the silence between us. Except for the occasional frog croaking.
Who knew so much could be said with a smile or a look.
The dog peed on John’s watermelon plant this morning.
The conversation that followed in the car on the way to Mass can best be described as hilariously combative. First, he was incensed at the dog. Second, it’s pretty bad form to go to Mass pissed off. About a plant. It was more resignation at the puppy’s antics than real annoyance. Until he decided to get ridiculous about adding a fence to the garden. Then I got annoyed.
Then, he pulled out a nuclear weapon.
The weapon? My friend Margaret Rose Realy.
Really.
Well, actually, her book. Somebody’s been secretly reading A Garden of Visible Prayer and using Margaret’s master gardening experience against me! The nerve!
We need to define the garden, he says. We need essential elements.
Seriously? I just want a nice, quiet, peaceful place.
After recording Catholic Weekend this morning, I joined John on the back porch. That area has turned into quite a retreat for us, and although I complained and moaned about the expense, and especially his design for the structure, I figured it’s his hobby, stay out of it.
Except, there’s no way for me to stay out of it. In fact, I’m always in it, as in, sitting in the cool shade enjoying the breeze and the natural air conditioning when the sprinklers come on and a fine mist refreshes us. Good call, honey. I don’t even mock his little corn rows even though the neighbors tease him plenty, even calling him Farmer John.
Anyway, so we’re sitting outside enjoying some sweet tea and watching the dog chase his tail. I’d been doing some weeding in the roses and he’d been playing around on his iPad when I came up and plopped next to him, complaining that I couldn’t get Immaculate Mary out of my head. He laughed and suggested that maybe I should get Mary out of the weeds…
Poor Mary…I had neglected her, too. These past weeks of travel, planning, and general malaise took a toll on her in the garden, but it also took a different toll on me.
Tending to the weeds is usually an easy project. In the evenings when I sit outside with John, it only takes a few minutes for me to pull some new growth, maybe cut off some deadheads from the rose bushes, and I’m back to my cup of coffee or glass of wine to continue to enjoy our conversation. If…if…I tend to things a little bit every day. If not, things get overgrown easily. If I abandon it altogether, and I’d often done that when the children were little, it would take a backhoe to set things right again. Sometimes so much damage had been done that razing the field and starting over was the best solution.
So I patiently tackled Mary’s little area. And Momma Mary patiently tackled me, pulling some weeds out of my heart and sending me on my way, pointing in her Son’s direction.
There’s still some work to be done. Some of those weeds took root, and the mulch needs a new layer, but things are looking better.
Wow. It’s been quite a while since I update this blog. What’s the point of doing something for pleasure if it becomes a chore — and that’s how I was looking at this little ole site for some time. A chore.
I was feeling pressure (that I created for myself, by the way) to somehow entertain or be clever for an audience. I forgot I was writing for myself because I enjoy it. The task is, of course, to figure out what is making me happy…writing? Not writing? Something else?
When I woke up this morning I took my coffee out on the porch while the dog was out doing whatever it is dogs do in the morning when there’s a big yard full of rabbits, squirrels, and birds to terrorize. There was a terrible rain last night that tore up our freshly laid mulch, and all the work was destroyed. It can be fixed, of course — restored if you will, maybe even better, but in the moment it was disappointing and frustrating to see.
As I was sipping my coffee and sighing over the mess, I caught sight of all the berries turning bright red on the vine. I’m totally aware of how many tweets and facebook statuses have been about the raspberries that are growing so abundantly in my garden, and I am amused by it. This is the same woman who tried to kill an African Violet twenty-eight years ago, and embraced the brown thumb responsible for killing every houseplant I came near since The Great Crispy Violet Episode of 1985.
I guess I was busy keeping little people fed.
Now I’m busy keeping myself fed — with fresh ripe raspberries plucked right off the vine.
Perspective is everything, I suppose. I could focus my camera on the mulch mess or the raspberries. I think I chose wisely.
Welcome to Day 6 of the Blessed, Beautiful, and Bodacious Blog Tour: Ten Bodacious Basics…Ten Minutes at a Time! Listen to today’s Audio Boo and enter to win your own copy of the book by leaving a comment, and then go visit the other blogs participating to get more great content (and chances to enter!).
Ok ladies — and guys, too, this is an equal opportunity opportunity. If you’re anything like me, the idea of taking a week, or even a weekend for a retreat or personal reflection on themes that are so important to our lives as women is crazy. We’re busy. Or so we say.
But that’s precisely why we need to take time to nurture our spirituality — whether we’re champion church ladies that can whisper a rosary in 5-minutes flat, or we’re curious about some things we’ve heard — perhaps a terminology we’re not familiar with. Or, like me, yearning to know more but not quite knowing where to get started.
If any of these scenarios apply to you, then you’ve come to the right place! Let me introduce you to my friend, Pat Gohn. Wife. Mother. Daughter. Catechist. Writer. Skilled Scrabble player, connoisseur of chocolate, chatty girlfriend, and author of a magnificent little book with a sassy title:
That title caught your attention, didn’t it? I know! What’s inside is even more amazing! Listen to Pat read this excerpt from the book. Her words will move you as she shares about the gifts of prayer in her life and love in action when a group of women respond tenderly to her needs during a difficult time in her life.
Now reflect and share on this quote from Blessed John Paul II…
“Perhaps more than men, women acknowledge the person, because they see persons with their hearts. They see them independently of various ideological or political systems. They see others in their greatness and limitations; they try to go out to them and help them.” (Letter to Women, par 12)
I want you to read the book. Pat wants you to read the book. And the good people at Ave Maria Press want you to read the book, so I’m giving away a copy right here. Just leave your thoughts about Blessed John Paul’s quote in the comments below. The contest ends at 11:59 PM, EST, on April 26, 2013. I’ll pick one winner by random drawing during the live recording of Catholic Weekend on April 27.
It’s been a crazy week, hasn’t it? By Wednesday evening it seemed like three weeks had passed, not three days! The big news is, of course, our new Holy Father, Pope Francis. Kinda neat to say that, isn’t it? I’m not going into any newsy stuff or deep thoughts because frankly (you like that pun?) so many others are doing a far better job of it, but I will share some related happenings. Mostly because I think they are all related, in the kind of way we can make anything related with enough imagination.
You see, that little petunia that sits above my sink flowered on Wednesday. I know, so what? Well, not so what. I’ve been hoping it would flower this year — and if you know anything about me, I have a real gift for killing plants. Anyway, I’ve been very distracted for some time. I was hoping that I’d find some new routines this Lent, something that would slow me down and help me smell the flowers, so to speak. I’ve adopted a couple of little disciplines for myself to help me with that refocusing — away from the worldly distractions and closer to God. Some days it goes really well — other days it’s a giant fail. So back to the petunia. I hadn’t noticed it flowered until Wednesday. Maybe it had opened its little bud on Monday or Tuesday and I didn’t see it. I wasn’t looking focused on the moment. But when I did it brought such singular joy in the moment!
Funny how something so simple and yet so precious can elicit such a beautiful response. Religious, really.
And by the way, did you know petunias are from Argentina? No. Kidding.
Then, last night I attended a chamber choir concert. My son knows I love this music, so he reminded me that they were performing the Chichester Psalms:
Of course, I went. And of course it was beautiful, but they caught me by surprise with a selection that charmed me: The Canticle of the Sun by St. Francis of Assisi. Here’s just a little bit of it…
Most high, all powerful, all good Lord!
All praise is yours, all glory, all honor, and all blessing.
To you, alone, Most High, do they belong.
No mortal lips are worthy to pronounce your name.
Be praised, my Lord, through all your creatures,
especially through my lord Brother Sun,
who brings the day; and you give light through him.
And he is beautiful and radiant in all his splendor!
Of you, Most High, he bears the likeness.
Be praised, my Lord, through Sister Moon and the stars;
in the heavens you have made them bright, precious and beautiful.
…
Praise and bless my Lord, and give thanks,
and serve him with great humility.
This morning at Mass I saw the most precious thing…and it has served me as a sweet reminder that ” it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs” (Mark 10:14).
During the collection, small children are called to take their offering up to a special basket in front of the altar. I expect there are all kinds of sweet things dropped into that basket — from toys, to slips of paper with handwritten good deeds, to some actual tithing of gifts and allowances.
I remember when my own children would use their special envelopes when they were very little (and later, the fruit of this lesson when I would quietly notice that they gave from their babysitting money or odd jobs).
I was distractedly making a mess of the offertory hymn when I noticed two little sisters coming back from their mission to the altar. They were clearly very pleased with whatever they’d dropped in the children’s offering, when suddenly the big sister turned to the little sister and gave her a happy bear hug before returning to their seats. She was so full of love in that moment that it had to spill out!
I often tease my friend Pat Gohn that I’m an Among Women fangirl. Maybe it’s Pat’s voice, so rich and engaging. Maybe it’s her ability to break down complex theological concepts into a conversation we could have over a cup of coffee (or two…or three!). Maybe it’s just the gentle way she has with her guests as well as the subject matter. You see, she takes these tough topics, like today, on the 40th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, and talks about them in a straightforward way that doesn’t mince words or pull any punches, but still comes across with love and respect.
Do read what she says about women, our gift of maternity, our need for dignity, and our source of healing.
Here’s a snippet from her article at the Washington Post. You know you want more…
The gift of maternity is inherent in all women. They are predisposed to motherhood by their design. Yet, as we know, not all women bear children. Even if a woman never gives birth, a woman’s life is still inclined toward mothering. All women are entrusted with the call to care for the people within their sphere of influence. This broadens our ideas of maternity beyond gestation and lactation.
A woman’s relationships with others, even though they may not be fruitful biologically, can be fruitful spiritually. Therefore a woman’s life–her feminine genius–is characterized by physical and/or spiritual motherhood.
Read the whole article here. Tell your friends to read it, too. And then tell her that she rocks. It’s tough telling the truth in today’s world.
another cup of coffee 